75K in dividends… America would be proud 🇺🇸💰
Weekly Blossom chaos report is here 🚀📊
And this one feels extra ridiculous because this weekend is America’s 250th birthday 🇺🇸🎂🦅
So naturally, while the country celebrates freedom, fireworks, and questionable decisions…
I’m over here celebrating high-yield chaos, dividend income, and buying things that may or may not require adult supervision. 😂💸🎆
We officially crossed:
💰 All-time dividends: $75,264.36
📈 Monthly run rate: $1,194.67/mo
🧾 Yearly run rate: $14,336.07/yr
🚀 Yield: 23.81%
🔥 Yield on cost: 27.38%
That means this portfolio is now spitting out almost $1,200/month while still looking like it was built by a caffeinated raccoon wearing an American flag bandana, holding a brokerage app, and yelling “FREEDOM CASH FLOW!” 🦝🇺🇸☕📱💰
Follower count update:
We’re now at 37 degenerates 🙌😂
That means 37 brave souls have looked at this high-yield experiment and said:
“Yep… I want weekly updates from this guy before the SEC, gravity, or common sense gets involved.” 🤡📉🚨
Welcome aboard.
There are no seatbelts.
The pilot is overcaffeinated.
The snacks are expired dividends.
And the emergency exit is probably blocked by a pile of covered-call ETFs. ✈️💥🥨📊
This week’s questionable life choices:
I’ve got the auto-buys rolling on CHPY and BLOX like a responsible investor pretending this is all part of a well-thought-out strategy. 🤓💵✅
Then I jumped into some MSTW…
Because this has to be the bottom, right? 😂📉
Right?
Please nod slowly and say something comforting. 🫣🙏
Nothing says “financial independence” like buying the dip during America’s birthday weekend while whispering, “Surely it can’t go lower,” right before the market lights a Roman candle and aims it directly at my portfolio. 🎇📉💀
This week’s portfolio mood:
🧠 15% “I might actually know what I’m doing.”
📉 25% “This could explode.”
💰 25% “Shut up and let the dividends hit.”
🇺🇸 35% “Life, liberty, and suspiciously high yield.”
I’m still chasing the big hallucination:
$250K/year in income 🌴💰🚀
That number still sounds insane.
Like “tell your friends and they slowly take your phone away” insane. 📱😅
But then I look at this screenshot and see over $14K/year already showing up, and suddenly the crazy plan feels just a tiny bit less crazy.
Still risky.
Still messy.
Still loaded with spicy yields, questionable tickers, and me acting like every red candle is a personal invitation. 🌶️📉🛒
But the cash flow is growing.
The dividend beast is eating. 🐉💸
The follower count is climbing.
America is turning 250. 🇺🇸🎂
And chaos remains undefeated. 💥🏆
Roast the moves.
Drop your best income plays.
Tell me if MSTW is genius or if I just bought a VIP ticket to the pain train. 🚂💀🎟️
Happy Independence weekend, degenerates 🙌🇺🇸🚀💰
